FIRST THERE WAS THE CAVE. BUT THE CAVE LEAKED, and there was
graffiti on the walls, and the plumbing sucked, and there was no door to hide behind so the sabertooth tiger used the cave as his personal pantry.
So man invented rudimentary tools, and then there was the hut. The hut was nice, but the roof leaked, the placed smelled of mud and decay, mice nested in the walls, and the dirt floor was, well, dirt. Woman complained until man couldn’t take it anymore.
So then there was the house. Solid roof, nice wood floor, and no sabertooth tigers. One bronze age, one Iron Age and one industrial revolution later and, ta da, lots of tools for the house. Given that the great law of houses is that, left to their own devices, they crumble, there are many uses for the tools. And then there are new tools. And more uses. It’s a wonderful hardware store- sponsored circle of life. All of which is why, as part of a complete repertoire of Manskills, you must master both the tools and techniques that will keep the house together.
Luckily, this is often fun. It’s the jaded man who doesn’t enjoy an afternoon spent destroying a hard surface with a jackhammer. And few feelings can rival the satisfaction of a perfectly straight painted line that exactly separates trim from wall. And that’s to say nothing of simple self-preservation of quieting that running toilet that is messing with your sleep. Yes, there are many rewards to mastering the plentitude of home skills.
Should you ever grow weary of exercising those skills, the raw mechanical abilities it takes to make your home a castle, just think what it would be like to battle sabertooth tigers when mowing the lawn. Things could be much, much worse, chum.